Monday, February 9, 2009

A sunny day and a cup of coffee


It really does not take a lot to make me happy. A good cup of coffee, or a cappuccino like the one above, or a triple grande soy latte like the one I'm sipping right now.
The sun is out and I feel like it's been a long time. I guess it has been sunny but too cold to take the kids out in it. Today the weather felt warmer so we went for a walk to Emma's preschool. I was happy to get some of her energy out because usually I feel like I'm dropping off a lit firecracker (that's actually her teachers loving name for her).
We walked, we smelled newly laid bark, smoke from burn piles (yes we live in a small country town), wet grass and mmm...coffee. btw, coffee is the leading source of healthful antioxidants than any other food or beverage in the American diet. Seriously I read about it here.
On a deeper note I've been hearing a lot of people's stories lately, at the women's conference and on blogs and I'm completely humbled by seeing what people go through. The stories that especially get me are about people losing a child or another loved one, an adoption not going as planned, or a husband getting cancer. I've always said "no matter what we go through we'll make it because we'll have each other. But what if one loses the other? I just cannot imagine what that would be like and how anyone could make it through.
Then I think about my complaints and the depression I deal with and the truth is there really isn't a reason why I should ever be down. I mean, of course we have
our share of problems but compared to others, we truly are not lacking in anything. That makes me feel thankful but that also makes me feel like there is something wrong with me.
And that leads me to think about how many women are possibly feeling like something is wrong with them because there is no outward reason for them to feel depressed/anxious/sad. It might be an imbalance in hormones, brain chemicals, it
could definitely be spiritual, but do they like me feel alone in their battle because they don't feel like asking for prayer for....nothing? A feeling?
See I told you my brain is an endless maze.

1 comment:

Kellie said...

Jewel,
Your post makes me want to go make a pot of coffee! I love coffee...

Love your transparency here. I am positive that what you are feeling is absolutely relevant in the lives of women we interact with each day...But we don't talk about it because we assume no one else feels the same...and shame tells us we shouldn't talk about it!

I have never dealt with a clinical depression...but i have many friends who have. And there is one common thing I hear from them: They feel bad asking for prayer when things are really "fine". But inside they are drowning.

I say ask for prayer...sometimes I don't feel like asking either. I don't know how much of my blog you have read, but I have a history with eating disorder. I'm recovered and doing great, but right after Christmas I had to confess to a friend that I was in need of prayer...again...battling the mind in an area that I feel i shouldn't be battling at 37 years old. Especially because I live a blessed and "easy" life! I felt stupid talking about it-but prayer was exactly what I needed.

And it worked. And I got back on track.

Be brave. Ask somebody you trust to pray for you. Meanwhile, I'm gonna pray for you too!

Good post!

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