She's Done It Again

My friend Francine that is. She's gone and written another book that I've had so much trouble putting down to to do anything else including cleaning, taking care of my kids, sleeping, even eating. Yep, I'm still talking about "Her Mother's Hope".

This is the first day of Spring Break. Well, not the first day, but you know what I mean, right? I guess Saturday with the fundraiser and Sunday with church and another fundraiser didn't feel like the start of a break. Now I can breathe...and read:)

This morning I woke to the sounds of my children rising, the turning on of cartoons and the pouring of cereal and milk. It sounded like the bigger ones were taking care of the little ones so I decided to wait on my coffee and quickly read the end of the chapter that I hadn't finished last night because I had fallen asleep.

"Her Mother's Hope" is about mother-daughter relationships. Great, just what I needed. Well, seriously, couldn't all women use some healing when it comes to this area of our earthly lives???

The other thing that I love about all of her books are that they seem to come to me at the right time. The second part of the story (don't worry, no spoilers here) is about Hildemara who grows up to be a nurse around the time of the start of World War II. Her character is a compassionate person who empathizes with everyone. When she starts nursing she learns, at the advice of an older wiser nurse, to give her patients to Jesus in prayer as soon as she leaves their hospital room.

What a message for me! I find myself so easily burdened by other people's stuff, sometimes to the point of being kept up at night, losing my appetite and falling into depression.

Today I have had a few different urgent issues come to my attention and honestly they've already threatened to consume me with worry, fear and all sorts of internal dialog while I rehearse how I can "fix things".

So, today I'm asking for prayer. For me because in a little while I do have something to do. I've invited my younger brother over for a "chat" (confrontation). After feeling helpless this morning about a family situation that's growing in urgency (the details of that will have to wait) I prayed and without wording it asked God to show me what I could do. Right after I looked at my phone and realized my brother had texted me asking to come over. I replied that he could but he'd be having a talk with me, not coming over to play with his nieces and nephew. He agreed to come anyway.

Also pray for all these other prayer needs I've seen and heard. I don't want to give too many details to protect the privacy of family and friends, but if you could pray anyway I'd really appreciate it. These are people I love and lives that are desperately in need of God's loving grace.

So here I am, waiting for him. I know that I need to lay my own feelings aside, as well as my expectations of how this is going to go. I need to just let God show up here and do His thing. I know he's faithful and wants to rush in healing like a hurricane.

Lord help me.

I Caught the Mail Man

I lost my set of keys which have the key to the mailbox, so I told my kids we had to wait outside so I could run and catch the mail man. Emma and Ruby immediately started giggling at the thought of me chasing the mail man and tackling him to the ground or something along those lines.

As soon as I saw him I made a run for it, with the still giggling girls following behind me ready to help. I got to him, a little short of breath, and explained that I lost my key (again) and asked for my mail. I grew anxious as he packaged what looked like bills into what looked like advertisements and it looked like that's all there was until....he reached back into the box for one more thing. A beautiful brown box from amazon.com!

I was so extemely excited to receive Francine Rivers newest book "Her Mother's Hope". I have literally been waiting for this book for years!

Let me tell you first of all one of the things that I'm pretty sure qualifies me as a nerd...if I like someone, an author, musician, speaker, ahemm...tv show (Lost) I stalk them! And by stalking them I mean more than becoming a fan on Facebook. I bookmark their website, read their fan mail, sometimes talk to other fans on their guestbook message board, read everything I can find about them and basically come to the point where I feel like they are really my friend.

So Francine Rivers is a friend of mine and she's been talking about her book for quite awhile now. The original release date was Fall of 2009 and I'm forgiving her for being a little behind because the first few chapters have been so good! Plus the reason the release date was pushed back was because her story, or saga, was too long so now I get to look forward to another book coming out soon that continues the legacy of young Marta from Switzerland.

I'm only a few chapters in so I'll have to give you more details later, but let me take this opportunity to tell you (probably again) about my Favorite. Book. Ever.

"Redeeming Love" also by Francine Rivers.

I was telling my neighbor about it recently and admitted that I allowed Redeeming Love to sit on my book shelf for quite awhile before someone encouraged me to read it. It looked like a Harloquen Romance novel (the only time I was into those was when I was probably 10 and my friend and I would sit in the back of the library skipping to the "good stuff"), and it was given to me by my mother in law, who read only what I thought were cheesy christian novels.

Redeeming Love is NOT a cheesy Christian novel! And it is NOT a explicit fluffy romance either, although Francine did write secular romance novels before she became a Christian. Redeeming Love, she has discribed as her statement of faith.

It's a story, similar to the book of Hosea in the bible, about a man who feels like God is calling him to marry a prostitute. He unconditionally loves her dispite the pain and rejection he faces because of her past.

I was in tears throughout the book, at first believing I wouldn't identify with Angel, the main female charactor, but in the end exclaiming that in so many ways I've been exactly the same as her.

Personally, the story brought healing that I was needing because of my past and I'm still thankful for how God used that book to bring positive changes in my mind and in my heart. The little book that looked like a romance novel and that was from my mother in law!

Have a lovely weekend:)

Rainy Days Are For Staying In Bed

Seriously, I found myself accidentally making plans to do just that when I was awakened this morning at 3:30 am to the sound of my window dripping. The joys of living in an old house for sure...

I went to grab a towel and secured it on the windowsill, held on with the blinds, and crawled back under my warm covers. Thoughts of staying there as long as possible, curled up with a good book, dreams of hot coffee brought to me on a tray...okay I'm going too far there.

I'm obviously not there because schools don't close for rainy days around here. Little ones need their breakfasts, too many emails are calling for my attention, laundry needs to be done (with new motivation I'll add).

But I'm thinking nap time will be my opportunity and I'm kind of hoping it will still be raining.

I'm reading a book by one of my all time favorite authors, Madeleine L'Engle. "Two-Part Invention" is the true story of her marriage and she's writing while her husband is sick and slowly dying from cancer. It's a beautiful story of love and pain.

Let me just write a couple of these thoughtful quotes which directly answer questions that have been on my mind and in my heart:

"If we don't pray according to the needs of the heart, we repress our deepest longings. Our prayers may not be rational, and we may be quite aware of that, but if we repress our needs, then those unsaid prayers will fester." (page 94)

"I do not want ever to be indifferent to the joys and beauties of this life. For through these, as through pain, we are enabled to see purpose in randomness, pattern in chaos. We do not have to understand in order to believe that behind the mystery and the fascination there is love." (page 123)

In response to a card she received which read "He settesth in pain the jewels of his love" she writes "God can provide the setting in which the pearl of pain is places."

And bear with me...this ones kinda deep;)

"If we human beings were truly aware that all creation is a unity, as two lovers are aware of unity, wouldn't we treat each other better?...We are one planet, a single organism. What happens on this floor makes a difference everywhere. For the entire universe with its countless galaxies is the settling for this pearl of pain."

Just what I've needed. Thank you Lord for turning my focus away from myself this week and today.

What I Learned At Bible Study

This is a sidenote from what I was planning on talking about but I just want to throw in that it's really nice that even though I live in a small town, there seems to be a women's event for wherever you are in life. There's MOPS, homeschool co-ops, reading groups, play groups, precepts bible studies, Beth Moore bible studies, basically anything you feel like.

I like that because I've been in places where it's difficult to start, let alone finish a book, and then again I've been in places where I just can't get enough of the bible and studying each and every word is important to me.

Right now I'm going to a weekly women's bible study at The City Church, which is a big church with several different campuses. They have different speakers every week and they definitely lean toward the more joyful, charasmatic side of things. Not what I'm used to or always comfortable with but they are amazing women, it's a good church and it's perfect for where I'm at right now.

But here's what I want to tell you about... This week they invited a speaker named Deborah Enos, who is a certified nutritionist. She gave a 90 minute presentation on good health and good eating. She's written a book called "Weight a Minute" which has chapters that you can literally read in one to two minutes! After a morning of her giving practical tips on healthy eating, I purchased her book and devoured its contents over a cup of afternoon coffee.



What she said resonnated so much with my own feelings about food and health, what I've learned from watching Food Inc. and other good information that I've picked up along the way.

Her book is NOT talking about a diet. It's a long term plan that supports simple principles that you can live by.

For instance she says to eat breakfast within 30 - 45 minutes of waking up. This jumpstarts your metabolism and can improve your whole day! She gives good examples of breakfasts filled with protein and fiber which will keep you full for three hours and curb sugar cravings that magically appear, at my house, around naptime;)

She also talked about being positive about ourselves and our bodies and instead of focusing on what we think needs to change, focusing on what's good. Being healthy starts in our minds.

You may be rolling your eyes at this point, sometimes I do when it comes to the whole "positive confessions". But Deborah Enos did have a lot of good things to say that I already agreed with so I guess I could give some of that positive thinking a chance;)

One more thing. After watching Food Inc. which I mentioned awhile back, I felt very overwhelmed on my next trip to the grocery store. I felt so convicted about the way big meat companies treated their animals and was sold on the health benefits of grass fed cows, free range eggs and organic fruits and veggies, but didn't know a simple way to go about changing our habits. I found myself vigorously scrutinizing every package and label and driving my kids crazy in the process.

Deborah's simple practical tips made my next grocery store visit much more exciting and reasonable. Instead of walking out with next to nothing I had a weeks worth of meals planned out...breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks!

Some Good Reads!

After Christmas I got sick with something that kept feeling like it was going to turn into a sinus infection and/or pneumonia so I (learning from my mistake a few months ago) decided to stay in bed and rest while covered in Vick's vapor rub:) This gave me some time to catch up on reading and I discovered some good books that had been laying around my house for quite a while now.

1. Fight Like a Girl by Lisa Bevere
I hadn't read it before because I kind of assumed it was another Joyce Meyerish "I am a christian victorious woman, hear me roar..." Not that I have anything against Joyce Meyer. She's an excellent bible teacher, but I could not get through the confident woman. Her tone was too defensive.

That's not what I wanted to talk about though. Lisa Bevere is one of my favorite authors/speakers. I find her so inspiring and what she says is biblically true but also fresh and lively. In Fight Like a Girl she talks about the power of our femininity and how we were created as an answer to a problem (Adam was alone and needed a companion) and how when Eve ate the apple she used her influence and became more of a problem than an answer. She talked about how we are made to feel like problems and so so related to this. This goes along with what John Eldridge wrote in Captivating about women feeling like they are "too much" or "not enough". We are too emotional, too manipulative, too angry, etc. Or we are not good enough. Feeling like problems we behave like problems. This message really spoke to me in how to talk to my girls. When I talk to them am I speaking to them as if they are a problem or an answer? It's really interesting when I think about that and think about how to approach them differently.

2. Under Cover by John Bevere
John Bevere is a better known author and speaker than his wife Lisa, but I'd never read any of his books. I was intrigued though because of what she's said about him and their marriage in her own books. What she said about him reminded me of my own husband so I actually got a couple of his books for Bill to read, but they ended up on my side of the bed. Under Cover was a pretty easy read about being under authority and how God places those people in authority for his purpose. It was interesting relating to the church, the government and even the family.

3. Driven by Eternity by John Bevere
I have seriously never read so many non-fiction books in so short of time, but these were really good reads and each one seemed to play on the things I learned in the last so I just kept going.

Driven by Eternity really shook me up. It's about heaven and hell and basically he's just bringing scriptures together which talk about the two with an allegory thrown in which I think I'll share with my kids. I have to say that I don't think about hell too often and I honestly have gotten caught up in thinking what many churches preach today (or at least preach by lack of sermon coverage). That is I know I wouldn't want to go there because I love God and want to be in heaven with him, but it probably wont really be THAT bad for the people who do end up there...no fun for sure, but all that stuff about lakes of fire and brimstone and worms that never die is just for effect...right?... So needless to say this book shook me up! I have to say it also upset my theology quite a bit and I think that's a good thing:) Driven by Eternity is a must read for every Christian and every person. It renewed in me a passion to see people come to Jesus which kind of led me to my next book...

4. No Compromise, The Keith Green Story by Melody Green
My parents were hippies who because Christians in the late 70's so I know Keith Green quite well. I grew up listening to him, Terry Talbot and the 2nd Chapter of Acts. Not only did we listen to their tapes, but we sang their songs when friends came over to visit. (Can you picture it???)My mom and dad named my sister Bethany, after Keith and Melody's 2 year old daughter who died in the plane crash with Keith, her 3 year old brother, the pilot and a family of 8.

But I never knew most of what was in his story No Compromise. The way he came to the Lord was inspiring to someone who's been a Christian all her life. He was totally zealous for God and not ashamed of it! They got people saved, offended people, shook people in their complacency and offered room to anyone who needed a place to stay. They started something called Last Days Ministries where people could come and live while they got their lives on track. They distributed thousands of newsletters, gave away copies of his album for free at his concerts, and did so much more.

5. Seven Habits for Highly Effective Families. I'm reading this right now and it might take me longer than all of the others. I'll have to write more about it later. What I've read so far is really good though and I think will really help me with some of things I've wanted to implement in our home, but have not really known how.

Good Books Inspire Adolescent Girls

Our oldest daughter Azzie is sooo into the Twilight books right now. All she can think to ask for her birthday is "Breaking Dawn". If you ask her about any of the characters or books, she'll talk until your eyes are glazing a little. Ask my friend Megan!

I skimmed through the first book making sure it was appropriate for our still eleven year old and I took her to the movie. I see the draw, I mean, a nice mysterious good looking guy who turns out to be a vampire, but it's okay, because he's a vegetarian (meaning he sucks the blood of Forrest animals and not people) and is drawn by scent to this awkward girl who doesn't know how pretty she is. And you don't have any scenes where you see little girls turn into ashen statues when the sun hits like in "Interview with a Vampire" because these vampires sparkle in the sunlight. Plus, he just wants a innocent romance with Bella, that consists of sleeping in the grass together, watching the Ocean from tree tops and watching her sleep. Creepy, but remember being 14?

My point is that I told Azzie she could read the books, but in between each book she needed to read something else. I gave her some options. I said she could read a book in the bible or a classic or something I pick out.

The first time I picked it out and gave her a Beverly Lewis book about courting Amish teenagers and had her also do a compare and contrast between dating customs in the different books she was reading. I thought it was a great idea, but she did not!

This time she picked Camilla by Madeleine L'Engle, a book I read again and again between the ages of 12-15. In fact it's falling apart. I carefully handed over my old library discarded book, while certain scenes came to mind causing me to smile. I hadn't really looked at it in years and I quickly noticed the phrase on the cover "Her life is filled with confusion. Will is ever make sense?"

"Wait" I said as something sparked in my memory. Let me look through this. Sure enough in blue and purple ink throughout the book is my own poetry inspired by L'Engle's outpouring of inspiration.

Here is some of it for your enjoyment. I believe I was 13...

~ Title page ~

And wishful thoughts reveal innocent smiles taken wrong.

Just leave me here along.

While tears fall like dew from autumn leaves.

Small attempts to bring life.

If only it all weren't so naive.

~ Page 3 ~

Dry sticky fingers are warmed in summer sun.

Small child gently weeping under rollercoaster lines of people.

~ Page 7 ~

Keep your eyes on the Lord...:)

~ Page 49 ~

Shy eyes wonder aimlessly

Nothing to occupy me...

~ Page 158 ~

Innocent smiles reveal conspicuous thoughts

And alas he's gone.

Too bad he wasn't smiling at me.

~ First page of book ~

12 o'clock at the train station

~ Last page of book ~

Will he even come?

And do what I want?

Wishful thoughts...

So, there you go. I was in therapy two years later by the way. I suppose I'll have to include a few discussions with my daughter during her time with Camilla.

With a Love

This morning I went to a Proverbs 31 meeting. My friend Becky and I walked in to find gifts at every place setting. Since I love gifts, (that's my love language by the way;) I was highly curious and quickly tore open the brown paper wrapping to find a book that I thought I'd lost. "With A Love" by Heather Ware, is the true story about Milly Ware, her husband Ted and her five children as they travel to Cuba as missionaries during the revolution which brought Castro to power. I read the book a long time ago and lent it to someone, forgot who, and haven't seen it again. Also, when I read the book I really wanted to someday meet the amazing woman in the story and I was ecstatic to find out that she was this morning's featured speaker.

At 89 years old she is one of the most inspirational women I have seen in my life and I left feeling so encouraged and refreshed.

Her website, where you can order the book, is http://tedandmillyware.com/

"Nurture" by Lisa Bevere

"Nurture" is the first book I've read by Lisa Bevere and I absolutely love it. Her writing is lovely to read and I believe she has, in her book, answers to some of the main problems facing women today in regards to their relationships with each other.

Lately I've heard over and over that women are looking for best friends, that they are longing for that Anne of Green Gables/Dianna Berry relationship. Not only that women are looking for mentors/mothers and they are hoping to mentor women/daughters.

This book responds to that longing and has really inspired me to continue seeking those relationships because God is doing something significant in the church today; gathering us together in order to grow us in our gifts, help us in our weaknesses and "strengthen [our] hearts so that [we] will be blameless and holy in the presence of our God and Father when our Lord Jesus comes with all his holy ones." 1 Thes. 3:13

Also, Lisa Bevere will be speaking next February at Christian Family Center on Camano Island, Wa. I'll post more information when it becomes available.