Weekend With My Sister

My sister has passed her six month mark at Teen Challenge and was rewarded with a weekend pass. And needing rest she packed up and came and visited my house! Can you imagine a house full of five children being restful?

We actually did have a very good time though and lots of good conversations that were waiting for years and years to come about.

On Friday I picked her up in Seattle and we headed to Costco to pick up some pizzas and Capri Suns to feed the entire neighborhood. Then we arrived home and I cleaned up the house while my sister took my oldest daughter and her friend down to a coffee house down the road for devotions and Jones sodas. This was the third week of "Disciplets", Azzie's middle school age girl group and I thought my sister would like to be a part of it.

At 5:30 about 20 kids packed into our living room to eat the pizzas and watch Avatar. The oldest kids were sophomores and Brayden and Ruby were the youngest, with all the other boys and girls in between. Crazy? Why yes I am;) 5 pizzas, 40 Capri suns and a long movie later and I was ready to plan that every week....see?

On Saturday we woke up, got ready and headed over to our neighbors yard sale. My sister was given a cool shoulder bag from Cambodia and I found some cute little coasters with pictures of Europe.

Then off to the Farmers Market. I have to say that I think this is how I'm going to spend every Saturday during the summer. Did you know that most booths at the market have samples??

After that we went home and everyone took naps. My sister seemed to enjoy the rest and enjoy a little freedom. Actually she went a little wild and crazy doing stuff she hasn't been allowed to do for the past six months. Sleeping in, chewing gum, taking naps, checking Facebook, watching movies that are PG-13... We got in the car and my dial was set as usual to the local Christian station. She immediately turned it to a station and blared Led Zeppelin. I prayed that we'd get a lot of laughing in this weekend and we definitely did about her "crazy" behavior. After dinner we went for a walk and enjoyed a view of the bay with an amazing sunset over it.

On Sunday we went to church and she enjoyed seeing people. Then we came home, watched more movies and took more naps. For dinner we cooked our farmers market meal of minestrone and brushetta. We finished just in time to leave and have her back by 9:00pm on the dot.

It was really great to be able to really talk to my sister with no walls between us. We've never had that as adult women and I felt like it was healing for both of us. For me because I sort of saw how far I'd come since I'd been in the same position of really "owning" my dysfunctional childhood.

The bulk of our conversations centered around one thing...being real. We talked about how sad it is that in a lot of churches and Christian communities you're only able to talk about your issues if you've overcome them. Then they can be your testimony, but if you're in the middle of it, then you'd better keep quiet. So then we just build up walls and no one really knows the real us. That's followed by feeling shameful about our "secrets" and it's just this bad cycle that leads no where good.

So I'm pondering today what it means in my every day life to keep it real.

Guess what!

My lil' sister in law, Katie, is engaged! The whole story is totally sweet and would make you cry if you heard me tell it (possibly because I'd be crying) but I'll save that for another day;)

I took some engagement pictures of the cute couple yesterday and thanks to my friend Lemonade Makin' Mama being so sweet and sharing her secret *free* photo editing website, Picnik, I have them to share with you today.

Okay, actually I am surprised that I had them to show you today. Picnik does take kind of long, but I really like all of the features and will definitely use it in the future. Maybe I'll just have to pay for the premium version when it comes time to take pictures of the wedding.....

in.....

I'm so excited.....

Beautiful.....

.....

Oahu, Hawaii!!!!!

Aloha;)

Easter Sunday

This Easter Sunday we spent the day relaxing as a family. We dyed eggs with a little food coloring.

Emma was very concerned about how we were going to get the candy inside.
I spent most of the time in the kitchen, and was happy to be there. Here's some fruit appetizers. I served this before giving the kids their baskets full of candy in hopes that they were fill up on fruit.
It worked!
We didn't have money to buy new dresses this year so I didn't really care that about the strawberry drips.

The boys hung out on the couch with the meat and cheese.

Soon we had an egg hunt out in the yard. I went to help Ruby hide the eggs, but ended up just taking pictures of her the whole time.

Ruby, my little meticulous child, soon got the idea of matching the colors of eggs with their surroundings.

After she finished hiding the eggs, the kids ran out to find them. They ran through the yard, grabbing eggs and putting them in their baskets. All of a sudden Ruby burst into tears. "They're taking all the eggs. I want them back!" She cried. (Don't worry I stopped taking pictures and actually comforted my baby girl with a hug).

This year I broke the cycle of Easter insanity and waited until after church to give the kids their baskets of candy. No sugar meltdowns at church...imagine that!

"Oh Chocolate bunny, I just love you!"

In church yesterday morning they brought in a live lamb. The pastor went through how sacrifices were so meaningful to the jewish people. It brought tears to my eyes to see that little innocent lamb and think of how it would be sacrificed for the sins of the people.

Jesus was the lamb of God and unlike the lambs which stayed dead, he rose from the grave and conquered death so that we can live.

I had already planned to make mutton for dinner which didn't go over well with the kids who had spent the morning petting that cute woolley little baby. Bill and I, on the other hand, thought it was pretty delicious!

Thanks and Cute Kids (Mine)

Someone must have been praying for me yesterday because it went good with my little bro. Better than good! God totally helped me be bold, honest and loving.

I ended up sitting my brother down and, instead of coming down on him for making some bad decisions, I told him about his potential and how he needs to realize who he is in God's eyes, not who people expect him to be. We talked about a bunch of other stuff too and Bill was right there with me letting him know that we both support him making good choices for his life and his future. And yes, I cried!

After that Bill and I went for a drive and we had a really good talk. We have known that helping people with their stuff is right at the heart of what we're called to do, but honestly we've been forgetting that lately. We decided to go somewhere and really get on our knees and come together to ask God for "something big". And by something big I mean, we're ready to jump in together and cross this threshold of what God has lined up for us.

With no fear!

God has answered my prayers. The spoken and unspoken ones.

* * *

Also, I realized that I haven't shared any recent updates or sayings from my kids. Here you go...

Me: "Azzie, your pants are falling down..."
Azzie: "No, I like them like this...everyone wears boxers underneath and sweats halfway off like this" (By halfway off, I mean halfway off her bottom...yep, we're so there! And isn't it funny how in middle school, things are always done by "everyone" or "no one"??)

Shariah got a job! She's going to be taking care of the neighbor's two little dogs after school every day. This is great because it's gonna be a lo-o-ong time before I'll be ready for another dog, so my puppy-lovin' girl can get her daily fix while the neighbors can buy the food and worry about letting them out at night for potty breaks.

Emma had to go to the dentist and get a little cavity filled this morning, plus sealants on her baby teeth. When the nurse called her back, I got up too. She turned and said "Mo-om, you don't need to come with! I'll be alright." Oh, my baby girl is so grown up all of a sudden:*)

Ruby got up this morning, cleaned her room and came down completely dressed. She was wearing black leggings with ruffles at the bottom, a purple flowery layered skirt, a bright colored shirt (not matching the skirt) with butterflies and a sequined black sweater that I'm pretty sure has Hannah Montana on the label. She looked AWESOME! I looked closer to see she was wearing lip gloss and she'd brushed her hair. She's only four people!

Brayden is going through a jealous phase where he doesn't like me to hold anyone else, especially Emma for some reason. He screams "My mama, my mama, my mama" until she gets off my lap. Emma thinks this is funny and yesterday came and jumped on my lap, looked over at Brayden and said "My mama" in a perfectly snotty little voice. He ran over with his fist preceding him Pop-Eye style and punched her in the behind, with rage in his eyes and through gritted teeth threatened "MY MAMA!" Is it wrong that I think this is adorable???

Love and Laughter:)

She's Done It Again

My friend Francine that is. She's gone and written another book that I've had so much trouble putting down to to do anything else including cleaning, taking care of my kids, sleeping, even eating. Yep, I'm still talking about "Her Mother's Hope".

This is the first day of Spring Break. Well, not the first day, but you know what I mean, right? I guess Saturday with the fundraiser and Sunday with church and another fundraiser didn't feel like the start of a break. Now I can breathe...and read:)

This morning I woke to the sounds of my children rising, the turning on of cartoons and the pouring of cereal and milk. It sounded like the bigger ones were taking care of the little ones so I decided to wait on my coffee and quickly read the end of the chapter that I hadn't finished last night because I had fallen asleep.

"Her Mother's Hope" is about mother-daughter relationships. Great, just what I needed. Well, seriously, couldn't all women use some healing when it comes to this area of our earthly lives???

The other thing that I love about all of her books are that they seem to come to me at the right time. The second part of the story (don't worry, no spoilers here) is about Hildemara who grows up to be a nurse around the time of the start of World War II. Her character is a compassionate person who empathizes with everyone. When she starts nursing she learns, at the advice of an older wiser nurse, to give her patients to Jesus in prayer as soon as she leaves their hospital room.

What a message for me! I find myself so easily burdened by other people's stuff, sometimes to the point of being kept up at night, losing my appetite and falling into depression.

Today I have had a few different urgent issues come to my attention and honestly they've already threatened to consume me with worry, fear and all sorts of internal dialog while I rehearse how I can "fix things".

So, today I'm asking for prayer. For me because in a little while I do have something to do. I've invited my younger brother over for a "chat" (confrontation). After feeling helpless this morning about a family situation that's growing in urgency (the details of that will have to wait) I prayed and without wording it asked God to show me what I could do. Right after I looked at my phone and realized my brother had texted me asking to come over. I replied that he could but he'd be having a talk with me, not coming over to play with his nieces and nephew. He agreed to come anyway.

Also pray for all these other prayer needs I've seen and heard. I don't want to give too many details to protect the privacy of family and friends, but if you could pray anyway I'd really appreciate it. These are people I love and lives that are desperately in need of God's loving grace.

So here I am, waiting for him. I know that I need to lay my own feelings aside, as well as my expectations of how this is going to go. I need to just let God show up here and do His thing. I know he's faithful and wants to rush in healing like a hurricane.

Lord help me.

My B-Day in Pictures

Yay! I finally found my USB cord so I can once again upload pictures. It might be a little late to show you Christmas pictures, but here's a bunch from yesterday...

(I'm pretty much the only picture taker around here and I was feeling like I'd been a little left out lately so bear with all of the self-taken arm in view shots...)

Appetizers inspired by Julia

New shoes

Flowers from my man!

Ruby (like her bangs?) and ME

I can only get my kids to take sweet pictures if I guarantee them a silly shot:)

My favorite dinner: Grilled salmon, baby red potatoes in butter and parsley and blanched asparagus...mmmm:)

My little angels



See?

My other little angels

Emma Joy and ME

I bet you're thinking I'm the one who really enjoys the silly shots...okay, you're right;)

ME and my MAN

ME and my *little* man

Dessert...mmmmm:)

Too bad there is still half of that cake sitting in my fridge calling my name....I....must....resist....the cheesecake....ugh

All in all fun birthday

Loved the family time

Doesn't feel like 30 years has gone by....

....okay it does

Good-bye

Better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere. Psalm 84:10

I arrived in Wichita, Kansas the day after my grandfather "Pops" passed away peacefully after suffering a major stroke. Originally we'd scheduled our travel plans thinking we'd be going back there to care for him and for my grandma "Muma" because he didn't have a hospice nurse assigned to him, despite the fact that they'd sent him home to die.

He returned to the hospital Friday night after a nurse advised the family that his condo where he's lived for the past twenty years was unsafe. He died Saturday morning, peacefully, in his sleep, with his only son by his side.

On the plane ride to Kansas, a woman sitting by me said "Tell me about your grandfather..."

What spilled out were all amazing things and I realized I had not one negative trait to share. He fought in World War II in the battle at Normandy as well as four other major battles. He devoted his life to being a mortician because "some one's gotta do it". He made his seven children feel rich even though they didn't have a lot of money. He would pull his car over, get out and give money to a homeless man, not to be seen and recognized be anyone accept for our Father in heaven (I only know this because someone in the family saw him do it - he got caught). During the Vietnam War, he sponsored refugees to come over and get an education and citizenship. He had a list of all the birthdays of his children, their spouses, grandchildren and great-grandchildren (last I counted there were 71) and sent $20 bills faithfully every year.


Honestly I could go on and on. He was an amazing man. He was ready to go, for he had made it clear as long as my mom can remember that this world was not his home:*)

While I was in Kansas, I ended up sleeping in his bed. I loved feeling close to him since we hadn't made it in time to say good-bye face to face. When I went to bed that first night I reflected on just being there with the pictures and walls he'd looked at every day. There were numerous pictures of the crucifixion, Mary, as well as pictures of his children and family. I fell asleep wondering if I'd hear some sort of message from him or from God.

Then the next morning I woke up with that verse that above on my lips. Actually it's a song. I knew it was somewhere in the Psalms so I found Psalm 84. How amazing since he'd actually just had his first full day in heaven!

How lovely is your dwelling place,

O LORD Almighty!
My soul yearns, even faints,

for the courts of the LORD;

my heart and my flesh cry out

for the living God.
Even the sparrow has found a home,

and the swallow a nest for herself,

where she may have her young—

a place near your altar,

O LORD Almighty, my King and my God.

Blessed are those who dwell in your house;

they are ever praising you.

Selah

Blessed are those whose strength is in you,

who have set their hearts on pilgrimage.
As they pass through the Valley of Baca,

they make it a place of springs;

the autumn rains also cover it with pools.
They go from strength to strength,

till each appears before God in Zion.
Hear my prayer, O LORD God Almighty;

listen to me, O God of Jacob.

Selah

Look upon our shield, O God;

look with favor on your anointed one.
Better is one day in your courts

than a thousand elsewhere;

I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God

than dwell in the tents of the wicked.
For the LORD God is a sun and shield;

the LORD bestows favor and honor;

no good thing does he withhold

from those whose walk is blameless.
O LORD Almighty,

blessed is the man who trusts in you.

So Much To Be Thankful For

It's Thanksgiving morning and before I write what I am planning I have to say that my husband is watching the football game and all of my kids, including Brayden (who is not quite two) are all singing along with the Star Spangled Banner...it's SO cute!

I don't talk about our family much, as in Bill's and my sisters and brothers and moms and dads. But I can count on the Thanksgiving holiday especially to bring all the issues we have right in our faces. We always have the problem of where to have Thanksgiving and the truth is we'd just rather go far far away and celebrate with strangers.

Last year we did skip town and it was wonderful. No stress, no family bickering, no one coming to dinner stoned, you get the point.

One major issue is my sister "B". She's struggled for years with drinking, drugs, eating disorders and relationship problems. I don't think she'd mind me sharing that with the world. She is very open about what she struggles with. Sometimes too open for my personal comfort!

So, on Sunday (I'm sorry if I'm skipping all over the place but as you can imagine there's a lot to this story) I was on my way to church to share that speech. It was the last day of hunting season so my husband had been tromping through the soggy forrest all morning and was meeting me at church. We were supposed to be there early and we were running late and of course I lost my keys, cuz that always happens when I'm already running late for something! I was irritated and yelling at the kids to get in the car, buckle up, etc. They were fighting with each other over who knows what in the back seat. I pulled out onto the road thinking "How am I supposed to go and stand up in front of the church and share when this is how my morning goes???"

I said a prayer that things would change and calmed down myself hoping that it would spread throughout the car. Then I decided to check my messages (I know, I try not to talk on the phone while driving, but listening to messages is different right?) and there was a message from my sister. She called to say that she's going to Teen Challenge and leaving as soon as possible!!!

Teen Challenge is actually for all ages despite the name "teen". It is a year long program which includes drug rehab, discipleship (it's a Christian organization), extensive counseling and eventually outreach. Rather than an 8% success rate like 21 day rehabilitation centers the success rate is much much higher. I'll have to find out what it is find out what it for sure, but from what I've heard, it's more like 80%.

So many seeds have been sown into B and that morning I was so beyond encouraged to see the glimpse of the seeds taking root. I was so filled with thankfulness by the time I arrived at the church.

B has a purpose and she's going to step forward in courage and allow God to lead her and prepare her for that purpose.